If you and your ex have had children together, your separation is the beginning of learning how to parent together despite living separate lives. Often, this can be difficult, especially if you are dealing with an individual who is a narcissist or unwilling to compromise. At Essig Law Office, we have helped many Illinois parents to work through the complexities of parenting in the post-divorce environment.
The Huffington Post provides parents like you with suggestions for parenting when conditions are less-than-ideal. If you are dealing with an ex who is bent on doing things their way, consider implementing the following behaviors:
- Keep communication private: One of the worst things you can do is argue, fight and try to negotiate in front of your children. Do your best to keep all communication private by utilizing resources like email.
- Consider therapy: Therapy is a valuable tool for both you and your children as you adjust to a new normal. If you suspect that your ex is telling your children negative things, encourage them to disclose what was said and to work through emotions and hurt in a secure environment with professional intervention.
- Create boundaries: If your ex seems to think he or she can push you around and override your decisions, it is time to create new boundaries. Regardless of the situation, stick with your newfound rules and show that you are serious about maintaining your limits.
- Stay calm: In moments where tension arises and you find yourself getting upset, do your best to remain calm. Find a coping mechanism and demonstrate your self-control by removing yourself from the situation.
Your efforts to be assertive, positive and proactive about your parenting beliefs can help you learn how to navigate your new set of challenges. You can find more information about parenting agreements on our web page.